1810s:
“Human” Harold Boggs
Romulus “Not-A-Bear” Eckersley
1820s:
Joseph “The Verbalizer” Richelieu
“Disagreeable” David Porter
Rutherford Graves, “The Boston Badmouther”
1830s:
Peter “Intimidator” Kohler
Theodore “The Physical Presence” Renholt
Norman “Kid Argument” Samuels
“Instigating” Pavol Krupcyk
Encyclopedia Tyrannica, 3rd Ed.:
Senator Benedict McLincoln feared communist influence so much that he remained incognito, in hiding, and virtually inaccessible for the duration of his single senatorial term, from 1950 to 1952. Believing the majority of American politicians to be under the sway of Soviet hypno-rays, he almost never attended senate hearings or sessions. Believing [...]
Tags:Commies·easy targets·heroes·patriotism·that scene in Patton
No one knows exactly what prompted a marginally successful Manitoban furrier by the name of Terminal J. Laughington to break into the comedy business. Some say it was his name, which former branch manager Dan Reckles points out, “bears a striking resemblance to the word ‘laugh.’” Others say it was his funny mustache. Still others [...]
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There’s been a lot of hullabaloo about celebrities’ increasingly detailed and absurd riders. These documents, detailing lavish and specific requests for backstage or green room goodies, are read with glee by millions hoping to catch a glimpse at the crazy lifestyle these celebs lead. But are they really newsworthy? Is a Nose newsworthy?Humans have had [...]
Tags:celebrities·Frank & Beanz·gandhi·greed·henry viii·Juicy Celebrity Gossip·lavish·riders·shakespeare
The latest in Terminal Laughter’s found documents of major turning-points in human history, these missives from Heaven’s Gate cult leader Marshall Applewhite barreled into the Terminal Laughter HQ tucked into an earthbound meteorite. The stylish 5-Star Notebook revealed many secrets of the Heaven’s Gate, including the time the group spent coasting around the cosmos on [...]
Tags:Hale-Bopp·Heaven's Gate·History·Marshall Applewhite·Nike sneakers·UFOs
Got a hankering for history up-close? Well, you’ve come to the right place. TL has unearthed a ream of real journals written by real people at the forefront of major historical events. For your edification, Terminal Laughter presents… Historical Journals!
Up first: Hat-maker Jasper Wren’s diary from the fateful maiden voyage of that great ship, the [...]
Tags:drowning·haberdashery·hats·James Cameron·Kate Winslet·Leonardo Dicaprio·Titanic
Hurumph! How did I get here? Man, my head is pounding. I can feel my brain rubbing against the inside of my skull. Where am I? Craig? Steve? Hey, you. Dude. Wait. You, guy. Lemme see those shades. What the…oh man. Dude. It’s finally happened…
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Greetings, child. It is I, your father. Come, sit down, and read what I have to tell you.
Aware as I am of your recent dabblings in history, alternative history, alternativity and guilt, I have decided, child, to rationally and pre-emptively answer the questions you will undoubtedly have within a matter of weeks. You may feel [...]
Tags:alternative history·conservative·dad·heritage·History·Joseph Conrad·massacres·private school·racism
Where perhaps better known shock rockers are content to indulge their more excessive impulses, Manhattanite Demon Pope (D.P.) Briggs had always remained tasteful enough to delight as well as inspire. More Arthur Brown than Alice Cooper, Briggs challenged the dominant social paradigms of his time—the early 1970s—without aiming to offend. While he the swath of [...]
Tags:anarchy·courtesy·George Stromboulopoulos·GG Alin·keepin' it real·manners·puke·punk rock·shock rock
by Big Chief Dances-With-Punchline, standup comedian
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To the Patrons of the Greater Poconos Resort’s Ha-Ha Lodge:
Me so solly.
Serious – me, Big Chief, heap big solly.
Many moons ago, great pow-wow held in Ha-Ha Lodge. Promotions range far and wide, from Rochester to Amityville. Bargain like this pow-wow rare as white buffalo – tourists save-um wampum like beaver [...]
Tags:inappropriate·legacy of shame·no shootum messenger·Offensive·Whoops!