From More Sensible Cuisine by Victoria Banksley, OBE
In keeping with the modern tradition of bestowing frivolous names upon themed recipes, my editors have encouraged me to imbue this crepe recipe with a motherly theme. It can be sensibly enjoyed at any time of the year, by non-mothers and even non-females. It is best enjoyed alongside [...]
Tags:catastrophes·clowns·clowns everywhere·cooking·crepes·Mother's Day·recipes·tender loving crepes
(LOS ANGELES) Brian Dangerfield, son and youngest child of comedian Rodney Dangerfield, has been refused enrolment at the prestigious and swanky Respectington Academy.
Declaring the child’s aptitude test results to be “lower than Rodney’s wife at a miners’ convention,” the notoriously exclusive school chose to award the final fall semester spot to the Elysse, daughter of [...]
Tags:back to school·beeswax·caddyshack·child education·COMEDY·dignity·earl grey·family·houndstooth·lack of respect·mr. wang·no respect·private school·respect·respect not given·rodney dangerfield·school admissions·Stand up comedy·sweat·ugly·vinny boom-botz
After record low parade attendance figures, the Santa Claus Parade Enthusiast Association contracted branding and event planning firm, Enter the Tainment to dream up new ideas for capturing new paradegoers. Terminal Laughter got its paws on the confidential document outlining these plans.
Re: Santa Claus Parade Attendance Figures
Ways to ‘Sleigh’ The Audience: Overhaul Suggestions for Santa [...]
Tags:aerobics·Bella·Christmas·Citizen Kane·Edward Cullen·Parades·Santa·Santa Claus·Twilight
by Dude Witherspoon. Originally published in Pshaw! Magazine
Stefan Grove, known as “Grunk” to his fans, was never one for routine. The lead vocalist and cash register player in the Montreal-based neu-noise ensemble FUCKFUCKFUCK has veered through a byzantine myriad of aesthetic and life choices – from burning his community college diploma, to eating [...]
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by Max Hartshorn
Funny how life works eh? A decade ago I’m headlining shows across the greater Moncton metropolitan area, doing sets far west as East Fredericton and as far south as Halifax North. Remember me Hubcap Comedy Festival ‘95 ‘96 ‘97? No? Best regional comedian three years in a row ring any bells? Thought it might. They say our [...]
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ROUND ONE, DEFINITION: “CHATOOKEE”
PLAYER ONE: A constrictive force which can render life stagnant and static.
PLAYER TWO: Ok, well its sort of like a train. Its this certain type of train. Dang, I guess I’m not too good at this…is it a train?
PLAYER THREE: A spell that ancient Indians used to help with their harvests.
PLAYER FOUR: [...]
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Excerpts from “The Very Scary Joke Boo!k”
Everyone already knows that Halloween is the best holiday. But did you know you can make it more fun? Here are some practically devilish practical jokes designed by Dr. Prankenstein in his mad scientist’s Secret Scaboratory. Easy to use, the tips are fun for all ages and will guarantee [...]
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By EVAN MILLAR
Mom, I know you’re mad about having to pick me up from school early but its not my fault, I swear. Well who do you trust more me or Ms. Linda?
Yes I did hit Mike Dupont.
Yes it was in the face.
But you don’t understand. He deserved it. He was pretty much begging me [...]
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By EVAN MILLAR
Baby, you know how committed I am to making this work. I love you so much, incalculably, more than I love love itself, which is a lot. My love for you is matched only by yours for me, which, albeit a subtler love, expressed seldomly and less verbally, is still crafted by our [...]
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